I awoke this morning to a gray and rainy day. It is my last day of spring break before another eight weeks of school ahead and truth be told I am not feeling it. I just lay awake in bed with absolutely no desire to do anything; get up, shower, or put on clothes. And while the next day should not fuck with today, reality is sometimes it does. I know what depression is and it is not I would like to return.
I am still unsure what compelled me to move, but I managed to concoct a smoothie and prep vegetables to be eaten later whenever. Then, I started with the binge watch streaming. Midway into episode three I realized I was watching other people pursue their dreams and it reminded me that during the past week while I rested, refreshed, and refocused, I knew for things to change I have to remain consistent.
Although there are quite a few things that need to change, I can only tackle a few at a time to ensure success. Physically, work out daily. Whether it is at the house or in the gym. For fifteen minutes or sixty. Eat cleaner. Emotionally, write daily. It could be a sentence, paragraph, or an essay. First thing in the morning, before bed, or anytime in-between. Spiritually, meditate and study. Start the day with gratitude and end in reflection. Focus.
For several months now, I have been incorporating ayurveda practices into my daily rituals. From a warm cup of lemon water first thing in the morning to abhyanga before bed, tongue scraping and dry brushing; slowly introducing a bit at time until now many things are just routine. Not tedious, but essential and invigorating. I desire for more of that and more self empowerment in my life across the board, starting immediately. My sanity necessitates that I maintain the boundaries that protect my inner sanctum. Growth, healing, and elevation, one baby step at a time, navigating this thing called life.